Happy Enchilada

Happy April Fools. I'm so glad for the news today that John Prine is 'stable', after hearing he’d been intubated last night in 'critical' condition with COVID-19 as I went to bed. So this is my new hand-washing song:

I know a guy that's got a lot to lose
He's a pretty nice fellow, kinda confused
Got muscles in his head, ain't never been used
Thinks he owns half of this town

Started drinking heavy, got a big red nose
Beat his old lady with a rubber hose
Then he took her out to dinner, bought her new clothes
That's the way that the world goes 'round

That's the way that the world goes 'round
You're up one day, the next you're down
It's a half an inch of water, you think you're gonna drown
That's the way that the world goes 'round

I was sitting in the bathtub, counting my toes
When the radiator broke, water all froze
I got stuck in the ice without any clothes
Naked as the eyes of a clown

I was crying ice cubes, hoping I'd croak
But when the sun come in the window, the ice all broke
I stood up and laughed, thought it was a joke
That's the way that the world goes 'round

That's the way that the world goes 'round
You're up one day, the next you're down
It's a half an inch of water, you think you're gonna drown
That's the way that the world goes 'round
That's the way that the world goes 'round
That's the way that the world ... goes 'round

It works as a hand-washing song (twenty seconds) if you sing the chorus and repeat the last line three times, which is the way the song usually ends. To understand the 'enchilada' foolishness that goes with the song, watch this rendition:

The world is approaching a million cases of COVID-19, with over forty-five thousand deaths. The US breaks two hundred thousand cases, and over a forty-five hundred deaths. Portugal is closing in on ten thousand cases and two hundred deaths.

cases: 920,939 global • 207,637 USA • 8,251 Portugal

deaths: 46,153 global • 4,601 USA • 187 Portugal

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BONUS FOOL: According to this story in the Wall Street Journal, the New England Patriots' team plane is being used to transport 1.2 million face masks from China, at the request of Massachusetts Gov. Charlie Baker; about three hundred thousand are then be routed to New York in support of Gov. Andrew Cuomo. I know it’s a pandemic and everything, but the masks will be in the air for a while, so can’t they use that time to put Patriots stickers on the packages headed to New York or something?